The holidays can be a fraught and stressful time for all of us, but if you are a mom-person who is raising young humans, it’s enough to drive you right up the chimney. Expectations are high, stores have been twinkling with Christmas lights since just after Labor Day, and you’re wondering how you’ll manage to bake 70 cupcakes for the class party. Also, the fact that you seriously consider sneaking a flask into the PTA meeting makes you feel like a bad mom.
This struggle is real. There’s even a movie about it. If you’re like me, you felt a tremendous sense of kinship and relief watching the Bad Moms movie last year. And all I want for Christmas this year is this Bad Moms Christmas movie. It. Is. Everything. You know I’m going to #BeThere with my fellow reprobate mamas. (You can get your tix here: badmomstickets.com)
Just remember this. You’re not a bad mom. It’s just called being a mom. Here are five of my personal “bad mom” moments from the holidays. I hope they validate you.
This HAPPENED. The “truth about Santa” moment was horrible in our house when it was my daughter’s turn. My uber-logical son? No prob. He kinda knew it anyway. My daughter, however, was traumatized by the revelation that we had been lying to her for years about a chubby stranger who broke into our house once a year to leave gifts and write notes in Mommy and Daddy’s handwriting. So, to make it better, I thought I’d give her some historical context about Saint Nicholas. Huge mistake. Pretty sure some of those kids’ moms are still mad at me.
Anyone else have momxiety? It’s a clinical condition in which one experiences extreme symptoms of distress and inferiority when in the presence of super-peppy, organized mothers who never forget to pick up their kids on early dismissal day and are always available to chaperone every single field trip. It’s exacerbated by having to make small talk at child-oriented gatherings. Often, the cure is a pedi. Pedi-CURE. See what I did there?
Tell me this isn’t an accurate description of that judgmental little bastard.
Gift cards are literally the gift that keeps on giving. Until the monetary value has been exhausted. Plus, e-cards mean no wrapping, and if you “forget” to send them until, say, Christmas morning, all you have to do is tap away at your phone screen, hit that button and voila! Instant present in the lucky recipient’s inbox.
When you’re all out of fa-la-la-la-las, you might need some adult-style sustenance. I know I do.
Do you have a bad mom moment? Share it with us in the comments!
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