To all of you…

People who never had a mom

People who went through the foster care or adoption system and were let down

People who suffered abuse at the hands of their mother (or their mother enabled others’ abuse)

People who struggle with their mother on a daily basis

People whose mothers don’t believe what they’re dealing with right now and invalidate their suffering

People who have separated themselves, temporarily or permanently, from their mom and get shit about it from society on a near daily basis because people can’t understand that choice unless they’ve had to make it

People whose mothers did that separation process and are still grieving about it

People whose mothers kicked them out for being LGBTQ+ or another thing that they could not understand or accept

People whose mother figures are not their mother, but another relative

People who recently had their mother pass away

People who not so recently lost their mother, but it still hurts every day

People whose other mother figures have passed away

People who cannot see their mother today because of distance and are missing them immensely

People who are trying to get pregnant, but not having luck

People who are permanently infertile

People who have pets instead of children and are looked down because of it

People who recently lost a pet that was like their baby

People who chose not to have children and are looked down on because of it

People who lost their children in a terribly nasty divorce

People who don’t have a family or spouse, but want one

People who were forced to get abortions by abusive partners

People who got an abortion, are in the small percentage of people who regret their choice, and feel like their voices are left out of the societal narratives about abortions

People who are still with abusive partners

People who are mothers who had to bury their own children

People who are struggling in any way, for any reason that I have not mentioned, today on this day that is sentimentalized and blown up all over social media…

You are beloved. More than you’ll ever know.

It’s okay to take the day off of the internet and just do self-care.

It’s okay to be sad or mad or anything else you’re feeling today. Your feelings are valid. You are beloved. You are cared about. Your chosen family is enough. You are enough. I love you.


Originally Published on


Emmie Arnold

Emmie Arnold (she/her/hers) is a hospital chaplain in New York; a Reverend in the PC(USA); avid cook; traveler (on hiatus); friend and family member to many; writer; and musician.


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