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Sweatpants & TV | Holiday Gift Guide for the Viking Horde in Your Life

By Lesley Gayle

It‘s difficult to buy for Vikings. When they see something they like, they pillage it before you can wrap it and put it under the tree. And so many cities have ordinances against goats roaming free, or sacrificing livestock in public.

I tracked down a dozen gifts to keep young, old, Viking or shield maiden, content until the Spring raids. And bonus – there’s no need to brave the heathen hordes at the mall! All these can be purchased online.

Beard Oil

 

Grimfrost grooming supplies are perfect for your scruffy Viking. In addition to grooming oils, bone brushes and beard beads, Grimfrost carries great t-shirts and jewelry for men and women. Allow time for shipping, Grimfrost is run by actual Vikings in Sweden. I think Mrs. Claus gets Santa’s beard oil here.

The Sagas and Myths

Vikings were illiterate. Luckily the sagas and myths survived long enough to be captured on paper. And now they travel digitally too. A quick search on Amazon will supply a treasure trove. I personally love Neil Gaiman’s take on “Norse Mythology”. You can also try the translated “The Sagas of Ragnar Lodbrok”.

Drinking Horns

Drinking horns can be found all over the internet now. My first drinking horn came from the great craftsman at The Froggy Viking. They are a family run startup. The Froggy Viking has several types of drinking horns, mugs, and holders. They also take custom orders. Visitors to their facebook page

Mead for your Drinking Horn 

A few smaller wineries and breweries make mead these days. If you can’t find mead in local stores, try Hidden Legend Winery. They ship to most states. They also carry honey soap for as low as $5.00, which makes a nice stocking stuffer.

Coffee Drinking Horns

If you need a portable horn for your morning commute, try one of these horns from Goat Story.

Goat Story believes the legend that goats discovered the magical properties of coffee. Maybe eating magical coffee beans is how Thor’s goats can pull his chariot across the heavens. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, read one of the books mentioned above.)

Valhalla in a Cup

Wrap up some Valhalla Java from Death Wish Coffee for your serious coffee guzzler. Death Wish also has an awesome ceramic mug in honor of Odin.

 

Chibi Art

What does your little shield maiden want this Yule? The chibi art of the most adorable future scourge around, that’s what!

Milbeth Morillo’s Society6 page has prints, coffee mugs, phone covers and useful items featuring her unique Chibi Viking and Norse designs. All her designs can be seen on Instagram @Milbethmorillo.

Board Games 

Hnefatafl- I have no idea how to play it, let alone pronounce it. But it’s the game played by the Norse before there was chess. It can be found at Amazon.com along with the official board game of History’s Vikings.

Reindeer Meat

Forget Hickory Farms this year. Give your Viking hordes the feast nature intended for them. Indian Valley Meats in Alaska ships sampler sausage and jerky boxes, featuring venison, reindeer, elk and smoked salmon. They even have reindeer hotdogs for the kids. Sorry Rudolf, Vikings have to eat.

Plush Goats

Ragnar’s go-to therapy animal is now much easier to own.

You Goat Mail will mail a plush goat to anyone you choose. Why? Because goats are the greatest gift of all time!

Actual Goats

The last two ideas are charitable giving. For those who want for nothing, even plush baby goats, you can donate an actual goat in their name, or part of a goat. Heifer International empowers people in developing areas with livestock.

Freedom of the Open Sea

Sea Shepherd, defenders of the oceans, is another charitable organization worthy of any Viking. Sea Shepherd Conservation Society’s mission is to end the destruction of habitat and slaughter of wildlife in the world’s oceans in order to conserve and protect ecosystems and species. Gifts of donations and some really cool merchandise are available.

Have a great holiday season, everyone!

Photo Source: Amazon, Hidden Legend Winery, Goat Story, Death Wish Coffee, Indian Valley Meats, You Goat Mail, Heifer International and Sea Shepherd Conservation Society.

Leslie Gayle

Leslie is a one time CPA, wife and mom of twins. She’s an over thinker who loves karate, thunder, and travel. Her sweatpants are yoga pants and she takes her coffee with milk.

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