So who’s up for a Momster of the Week episode? (Do you see what I did there?) Cue up Jonathan Coulton’s track “Creepy Doll” and jump right in, because this baby? Ain’t no sweet ride.


New ‘do

What’s the first thing a girl does when she’s going through a tough time? Cuts her hair. Mary is floundering, and Castiel and Sam see it clearly. Dean? Does not, or more likely, will not. He thinks their shared love of cold bacon, chili-lime jerky and Steppenwolf is more than enough to get her through her shakiness at being mortal once more. When Mary finds a case the old fashioned way (aka: a newspaper) she’s keen to get on the hunt and Dean is too. Winchesters? Using their work to distract them from their emotional problems? Sounds literally familiar.


If You Like It Then You Shoulda Put a Halo On It

Agent Beyoncé (subtle, Cas) goes out on a hunt of his own, trying to track down Lucifer’s latest meatsuit. And his partner? None other than the dethroned King of Hell himself. Guess Demariel is no more. It’s all about Crowstiel, now, baby. Crowley makes an excellent point when he says it’s been “months since they’ve tried to kill each other” and they should definitely work together. The humorous music cues alone pointed out that this was a reluctant (at best) buddy cop situation.


Come On, Get Happy

So the investigating agents are Shirley Partridge, and her trainees, Agents Cassidy and Bonaduce. Adorable. And Mary plays her part just right as they question the coroner who tells them that the vics died of acute hypothermia in a 65 degree room. Their hearts were literally frozen. Dean notices a handprint on one of the vics’ arms—this time it is not from being dragged out of hell, but from frostbite. Wait a minute. What? Weeeeeeird.


Mom TV’s Cribs

Mary and the boys head out to work the case, and, despite her overprotective sons, wastes no time taking off on her own in the haunted house. It’s not long ‘til she is trapped in the creepy doll room with a freezing cold little ghost. I loved the way the boys reacted. Dean went in, iron blazing, to get the thing that dared attack her. Sam immediately wrapped his arms around her to pull her away from danger. She may not have raised those boys but man, they love their mama. Later, Mary wants to canvass neighborhoods, but Sam and Dean tell Mary that the internet has made most of the leg work of hunting “obsolete.” Again—wait a minute. What? We’ve seen our boys hit the pavement enough to know that’s not entirely true. The bigger issue? Mary is the one that feels obsolete. Sam offers to teach her how to research via laptop and her small, sad smile makes us realize—Mary doesn’t belong. And no one knows that better than Mary herself.


Good Cop/Bad Cop

Cas and Crowley actually make a pretty good team, huh? They track down Vince Vincente’s sister and she tells them that Vince and his “groupie” left after Vince cured her of her paralyzation. Cas is annoyed enough to tease Crowley about wanting to save his mother. Crowley reminds him that she is the most powerful witch of her age, the only one who can cage the devil himself, and whether Lucifer kills her, she is his hostage, or she works with him willingly, none of that sounds like a good outcome. Rowena must be found. And speaking of Rowena…


I Feel Pretty

Vince Vincente is going, in his words, “all Keith Richards”, and Lucifer needs our favorite redhead to cast a spell to make his meatsuit a little more permanent. And if she doesn’t? He’ll decapitate her. She begins a spell that she claims is a combination of Book of the Damned and Celtic Magic that will give his vessel the resilience and strength of the mightiest tree. “There’s a woody joke in there somewhere,” Lucifer snarks, before he threatens her again. Of course, our Ro is no fool. She speeds up the aging process, telling Lucifer “You thought Keith Richards was bad? Try Iggy Pop!” (Ha!) She then casts Lucifer to the bottom of the ocean. Maybe he can hang out in the old home of the First Blade, eh?


Lucas the Friendly Ghost

The boys mistakenly think the ghost children are myling, and that their intent is evil. Mary knows better. When the boys leave her behind (drowning in sad music cues that let us know she is really struggling) Mary hits the telephone and calls up on some leads, finding out the name of the little boy ghost and getting a hunch on how to save him. As foolish and stubborn as only a Winchester can be, she heads out on her own. As she does, Sam and Dean go on a salt and burn mission and have a broment where Sam expresses his worry over Mary and Dean asks for just one moment of ignorance-is-bliss. They are quick to get back on the same page when they get back to the motel and realize their weapons are missing and Mary is too.


Mother’s Little Helper

Lucas tries to help Mary find the problem in the basement, until she is interrupted via telephone by the boys. The call cuts out and the boys hit the road, determined to save Mary. They find her just in time before she has a heartsicle, but not before she’s possessed by the spirit of the child killer. She tries to freeze Dean and he begs her to fight it, just like he begged John so long ago to fight the Yellow Eyed Demon. Just as it did with John? It works. Ultimately the Winchesters prevail. But not before all of them are questioning themselves. Fully.


Season of the Witch

Good Cop/Bad Cop catch up with Rowena, who is calmly sitting on Vince’s now Lucifer-less porch, drinking tea. She loathes that she helped free Lucifer, and yet is still smart enough to decline helping the duo. “That whole FBI pantsuit look? Not my hex bag,” she says. “But if you get Lucifer cornered and you find yourself in need? I’m there.” Ooooo! A new trio! I cannot wait for Crowstielena to work together. (Okay, okay, I get it. Enough with the portmanteaus, already.)


You…Lost and Lonely

Dean tries to apologize to Mary for his and Sam’s horking in on Mary’s case. They discuss it for a bit, but it’s clear Mary’s thoughts are a world away. “I miss John. I miss my boys,” she says. “We’re right here, Mom,” Sam says, hopeful, and it’s heartbreaking. Mary explains that she is still mourning the loss of her heavenly husband, baby Sam and little boy Dean. Seeing her grown boys only reminds her of her pain. Dean is quietly crushed as he realizes what she’s trying to say—she has to go. She apologizes, but it’s agony. She makes to hug Dean and he pulls away, broken. She takes John’s journal and hugs Sam, saying, “I love you. I love you both.” And then she leaves, making Sam flinch when he hears the door of the Bunker clang shut. And Dean stares off into the distance, wondering, again, why he cannot keep anything he loves close.

Well, that turned into a massive, massive bummer. How will Mary navigate her new world? How will the boys deal with her absence? Maybe we’ll get some answers next week in episode four, “American Nightmare.”


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