For the second time this season, we start off in the not so distant future. This time, with Caroline, who has moved to Texas, made a career out of bossing people around, and what!? Has a fiancee? Stefan and Caroline = OTP?

1 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

Caroline’s fiancee apparently wants to make a trip back to good ‘ol Mystic Falls before the wedding, but Caroline wants to hear none of it leaving us to wonder: exactly when and why did she give up on her mystic little town and her quest to save it?

Back in the present, not much has changed. Mystic Falls is still off limits and Lily’s heretics are up to no good. After vamp-napping and torturing Caroline as retribution for the death of a truly forgettable member of Lily’s pyscho little family (no seriously – what was his name again? Marcus? Marco? Malcolm! That’s it.), Damon and Stefan set off on an unsuccessful rescue mission.

By unsuccessful, we mean Matt dies. Again. But just for, like, six minutes! We don’t think there is any brain damage. Stefan’s apparent former flame, witchy Valerie, has turned Caroline’s skin to vervain, making her untouchable, and Damon abandons the mission to keep Mama Salvatore from ‘taking away all of his toys’ (i.e. Elena’s coffin currently stored in the Salvatore family crypt where they are currently burying Marcel Malcolm). Damon is unsuccessful here as well.

2 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

Not willing to admit defeat at the hands of Lily, the Salvatore brothers come up with Plan B – a trade: one missing heretic for two vampire ladyloves. Nothing could go wrong there.

3 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

Meanwhile, back in the world of the (not all) living, Alaric is still working to get Jo back from the dead despite Bonnie’s warning that this magic stone is seriously bad news. Again, nothing could go wrong there, right? Bonnie’s bloody massacre of a vision about it is probably just an overreaction…

Finally, we discover that Stefan and Caroline may not be endgame after all, as she instructs her assistant to ignore any and all further calls from Stefan…urgent or otherwise. Ruh roh. Who is this fiancee with ties to Mystic Falls?

4 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

5 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

(*gasp* What if it is Klaus, you guys!? Who is with me Klaroline fans???)

However, after a stake to the chest, I’m thinking maybe she should have taken that call.

6 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

What I’m Loving:

Caroline continues to be downright fearless and enjoyable, which gives me further hope that she can frontline this show. Just a tip, though, Caroline honey, don’t laugh at the crazies!

I am also enjoying the time jump. While it may be a little played out in general television narrative, in this case it gives us a puzzle to solve, a reason to stay invested.

What Makes Me Wonder:

Aside from maybe Valerie, I’m finding all of the new additions this season to be a little lifeless (no pun intended). I’m hoping that they will be foiled soon or get a little backstory.

I’m also curious about where exactly are they going to take Matt Donovan from here. Other than being the convenient “human of no free will,” I’m not really sure what purpose he serves now. Sole police officer in an abandoned town? I wonder how much that gig pays…

What Is Coming Up:

7 - Sweatpants & TV _ The Vampire Diaries 7×02 – Never Let Me Go

Will Lily and Enzo be the newest pairing? Isn’t that a little incestuous? Maybe? I don’t know yet.

I am all for having Jo back on the show… I actually really loved her character. If Alaric is successful in resurrecting her, will the twins she was carrying be resurrected too?

How come I feel like this stake-throwing, scar-giving, unnamed baddy could possibly have something to do with this evil resurrecting stone? And perhaps a missing heretic?

Overall, we are now two episodes P.E. (Post Elena) and I’m not missing her as much as I thought I would. Maybe change is good.


Stefan: “I only hear one set of footsteps!”
Damon: “And I only hear righteous I-told-you-so’s.”

Damon: “I got 60 years to kill. Having an enemy? A nemesis? A maniacal villain with maniacal villain motives? You kiddin’ me? Not the worst distraction in the world.”


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Katie Fowler Hawkins

Katie is a 30 year old consumer of pop culture in all of its various forms. From music to television to books and movies, the word FAN is putting it lightly. It all started with a little TV show (you might have heard of it..) called “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and the rest is a long growing history of geekdom and nerdism. There are an average of a dozen or more new episodes to watch on the DVR each week (favorites being Grey’s Anatomy, Supernatural, & The Vampire Diaries) and she reads 4-5 books a month all while being a new wife and stepmom of two preteen boys. Though she has been an aspiring novelist since the age of 6, she works a boring 9 to 5 day job in advertising.

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